Dear God, Why Broke My Heart?

Dear God,

Why Thee broke my heart?
No one nor twice, not the quantity but the quality.

I know I lack of everything in Your eyes.
I don't even go to church every Sunday.
And I don't even read Your words on daily basis.

Is that why?
Is that why you slapped me?
By not allowed that happen to me but to my dear one?

I am broken.
Into pieces.
This is hurt so much.

Oh dear God,
Please don't allow this happen to my dear one.

I want to say let this happens to me,
but I'm a mere human.
I will say, let this happen to those bad people.
But maybe, I am the bad people.
So you punish me through this.